More Dongs on a Friday. Surprise!!

Due to popular demand, mkdong has been modularized!!  I present to you dong.py version 0.0.1.

Enjoy:

#!/usr/bin/env python

''' MKdong turned into a module. I think I was smoking crack and/or high on Red Bull this day.

Dong goes into underpants Dong goes into boxers Dong goes into vagina Sperm comes out of dong Sperm goes into vagina Sperm goes into egg Dong goes into mouth Pee comes out of dong Pee goes into toilet Why am I iterating this crap? '''

import os, sys

blue = '\\e[0;34m' # blue

class Dong:

def __init__(self, maxlen=40, color=blue):
    self.maxlen = maxlen
    self.color  = color
    self.dong   = None

def mkdong(self):
    self.dong = '(_)/(_)'
    for i in range(self.maxlen): self.dong += '/'
    self.dong += 'D'
    os.system('echo -e "%s%s"' % (self.color, self.dong))

class Sperm(Dong): def init(self, count=500): self.count = count self.spermcount() Dong.init(self)

def __repr__(self):
    return '' % self.count

def tighty_whities(self):
    print 'Tighty Whities lowered your sperm count!'
    self.count -= 50

def boxers(self):
    print 'Boxers raised your sperm count!'
    self.count += 50

def spermcount(self):
    print 'Sperm count is %d' % self.count

def bike_seat(self):
    print 'asdjfoisadjs'
    pass

def radiation(self):
    print ':-x'
    pass

def castration(self):
    print ':('
    pass

def smoke(self):
    print 'awwww yeahhhhh.'
    pass

class Egg(Sperm): pass

if name == 'main':

try:
    donglen = int(sys.argv[1])
except:
    print "usage: mkdong "
    sys.exit()

if donglen > maxlen:
    print 'warning: a %s" dong is too big! cannot be longer than %s"!' % (donglen, maxlen)
    sys.exit()
else:
    d = dong(donglen)
    d.mkdong()</pre>

There's really no excuse. I should be ashamed of myself but I'm not.

Virginia Blows

That is all. Been here a week and while I’ve had fun, it feels like it’s been a month.

I miss my friends and my family that are in this area, but that’s still not enough for me to want to stay here for any meaningful length of time.  But hey, it’s been like 13 months since last time, so it’s not all bad.  I have a gracious host, fun coworkers, and also the internet.

But despite that, when I’m here it feels like I’m not living my own life. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I couldn’t wait to leave when I moved away over two years ago, and now every time I come back that feeling quickly returns.

Blah… Whatever, bitches.

Actually, I think it’s your fault. Yes, you!

Here enjoy this: Someone ported mkdong to Perl. Not sure how I feel about that. Bittersweet?

Taking over the internet, one dong at a time.